Dying to Self

One of THE hardest things to learn in life, is how to die to self. What do I mean by that? Why on earth would someone want the self to die? After all, am I not here on this earth to get what I want, when I want it, and how I want it? Everyone around me gets what they want, so I should be entitled as well, right? All seemingly good questions that deserve good answers, but still is it a good enough reason to follow this path of dying to self? I suppose the biggest question is, what am I'm going to have to give up in order to actually die to self, without being sure what will be gained in the interim?

Actually, I thought the same thing when I first read this term. It didn't sound like an easy thing to do, and if there was no gain, I wasn't sure I was so interested in trying. However, the more I read, and actually tried it out, the more I understood what it really meant, and how it could change my life for the better. After all, sticking with the status quo had not worked too well so far, so I was ready for something different. And it wasn't so much about what I didn't have, but more about how I wanted to experience my life while I'm here as far as peace of mind, contentment and happiness.

Dying to self has to do with letting go of our tight hold on our position in life, who we are, what we do, recognition, how much money we have, where we live, the people we know, and keeping that at the forefront more often than not. It's about striving for more instead of being content with less. And yes I know, no one likes to hear the word less when it comes to anything. After all, we work very hard to arrive at that perfect place we think will bring us all that we want in life, so it would seem counter productive to change my way of thinking at this point right? But what happens when you stay in that striving mode, pushing to get what you think you deserve, but in the midst of the struggle, you lose any real peace or contentment, or even satisfaction with who you are, how you feel, what you need to feel loved or valued, or even if you truly value yourself?

Dying to self can also be seen or felt by learning the meaning of humility. Here' Websters definition......humility: a modest view of one's own importance....meekness. So I guess a more clearer view or understanding of dying to self is more about allowing your "self" to fade to the background a bit, to get a better idea of how unimportant you are. After all, it's only right to realize that there are people around us who have more authority, status, reputation, rank....whatever the case may be, and that has to be OK. Just as we have more than others in a lower position. I suppose this is primarily about seeing yourself and others as equal......no one person is better than anyone else. They may higher position.....but that does not equal more valid in the bigger scheme of things.

So again, you ask, what is the point or what would be accomplished by this exercise? What I found is that that when I seek humility, or die to the self, if allows me to be more accepting, compassionate and gentle towards others, no matter their position, especially when their position attitude wise is different than mine, which is often more challenging than a class or work position. And, I find that the more accepting i am of others, then the easier and more gentle my life becomes, which is ultimately my own personal goal at this point in my life. Of course I think that anyone can adopt this attitude, young or old....doesn't matter. I honestly wish I had heard of and understood this position more clearly when I was younger, for it would have made my life a lot easier in the long run. But we all learn things in our own timing......and I can for sure still put it to good use.

More on dying to self tomorrow.