This is obviously a subject that hits home for most of us. It seems each day brings with it new areas to navigate, figure out, endure, or brainstorm just to get through, somehow leaving us feeling slighted in some way. Even when we do feel we've reached some resolution, a subtle hint of injustice is left behind, especially if we've been hurt. Doesn't matter the situation, our righteous indignation steps in and assures us that we are right in the way we feel, and no one can tell us otherwise.
So why are we so disappointed when things don't work out the way we expected and completely knocked off our present course? Why is it so important to hang on to understanding why things happen the way they do, thinking that if we do, it will result in peace, or the person that you believe hurt you will be punished in some way? I suppose it depends on what didn't work out, whether a relationship was broken, the raise we were due went to someone else, or you didn't get to do something you were really looking forward to. One just as important as the next, but still not important enough to ponder each day until bitterness and resentment set in.
Whether you believe this or not, you can walk around with your disappointment until the cows come home, waking up each morning believing you were right, while someone else was wrong, and it eventually gets you one place for sure.......nowhere. And it's important to realize it really does nothing to the situation or person that you believe slighted you in some way, but it does affect your ability to wake up each day and feel peace, joy, and a sense of contentment. I believe most often, even if someone gives you an apology or there is some logical explanation for why something didn't turn out the way you thought, you still have the tendency to hang on for dear life the disappointment that you feel.
I'm wondering what ever happened to forgiveness, understanding, or giving people the benefit of the doubt, no matter the circumstances. For what could possibly be gained by continuing to punish ourselves or others, for if you harbor ill will, it will affect your relationships because people will more often than not, pick up on the resentment and choose not to be around you. Bitterness, anger, and resentment are hard emotions to be around, and take a tremendous amount of energy to hang onto.
So when things don't work out the way you thought they would, whether you are satisfied with the explanation or not.........let it go. The only thing that asking why brings is discontent and dissatisfaction which in the end will steal whatever peace and joy you're able to grab hold of in this life. If possible, maybe you could see the whole experience as something you were suppose to learn about yourself. Things like patience, the true meaning of forgiveness, or understanding there are so many other things at work when you don't get what you want or feel you deserved.
Remember it's not why you have the disappointments, because you WILL have them......it's how you handle them. It's important to see that nothing is gained by pointing the finger outward, hanging onto righteous indignation and determination to punish, but learning to let go of believing the world and those in it are perfect. Expectations yield one thing......disappointment.
