I'm sure at some point most of us have had thoughts, dreams, and visions of being parked in a beach chair someplace exotic, allowing the woes and cares of the world to melt away with the suns warming rays. It's a good vision, for it brings, even if momentarily, a sense of relief from life's daily situations that can leave us so very depleated. And when you are forced to spend most of your time at home still and quiet, tucked away from the world, those visions can come in very handy indeed. You need a change of scenery from your "stuff", just as I need a change of scenery from my four walls.
Of course my challenge, keeping with the tone of the previous blog about the weave of life, and how to start visualizing how you see yourself in the world. is to step away from the "checking out of reality" scene that the beach brings, and really picturing yourself according to what your physical self experiences at any given moment. For instance.....you woke up with a headache, slept through your alarm for work, ran out of shampoo, and now your car won't start. I know.....a doozy of a morning. But for me, I see myself locked in a closet, naked and covered with soap suds, with no one even remotely closeby to answer my screams for help. In other words completely and totally helpless, with seemingly no way out.......the key word being helpless.
So for a moment I have taken time to connect my gut feelings of helplessness, to hopefully a way in which to find a way out of my predicament. Of course the end result will be not that I have a headache and late for work, but how I decide to be with all of that and not lose my mind, or turn it into a situation where I beat myself up for essentially being in the midst of things that simply go wrong in life....period.
Of course the worse case scenario in this situation, is getting fired for being late. The other things like a headache, running out of shampoo or a car not starting is just stuff........you know the "if it's not one thing it's another syndrome." Just the wheels of life moving along as they see fit. So back to the closet scene. The goal here is to accurately connect with the feelings of helplessness, where if you are feeling helpless in one area of your life, your likely to feel it in another. That can come later. But for now......you're in the closet.....you don't like the feeling obviously or what else it brings up about your life.......the trick is.......how to let go of that helplessness so you can simply get back to life and correct those things that are immediately wrong. Bottom line....you want to.....need to get to work, so some things will have to take place in order for that to happen, and focusing on your helplessness won't accomplish much.
And obviously, this is not really about having a headache, running out of shampoo, or being late for work, but being able to connect the dots from the situation at hand, to some really hard core feelings and emotions that it brings up about you and your life. Whew.........talk about going around to the back door to make a point. Well.....sometimes it takes as long as it takes.....but I eventually get there.
Since I learned to do this in my own life, I have gone from visions of being locked in a dark shed with my feet stuck in cement, to hanging on a telephone wire out in the middle of the desert.....or my most recent favorite, in a small boat out in the ocean with a small leak. My most immediate need, if I can't properly plug the leak, is to start throwing things overboard that I find I can live without. Of course in my mind, those things can be people, things, attitudes, behaviors....etc....that I have held onto for years and is starting to weigh me down. And of course weigh me down SO much that I am starting to sink. I either hang on to these things, or I save myself and start tossing things out.
I realize to many this may sound silly, or you believe there are better ways in which to cope with everyday little problems. But for me, I see it as a God given gift that helps me connect with my true feelings about self, others as well as the world around me. It reminds me of how He sees the world and how He doesn't want us to be weighed down with things that steal our happiness, peace and joy in life. I can pray that those things be taken away....those seemingly aggravating situations, big or small.......but then I won't have had the opportunity to dig a little deeper and learn the big lessons in life. The "what really matters" lessons.
